The yelling in my head is unstoppable

I just spent the last hour registering on TheKnot.com and looking via The Internets at various wedding/reception/future crime scene sites. Mostly, it's been a lot of The Jenny In My Head Who Is A Cheap Bastard (Or TJIMHWIACB, for short) screaming as loud as she can, WHAAAT? You expect me to pay how much for a two-hour site rental??? I have never spent so much as $100 for a party, and now the wedding industrial complex would have me pay around $28,000 for the one-day event. Sure, that's an amount that would make your average My Super Sweet 16-er rage about how cruel and penny-pinching her parents are, but given that I think my parents never ponied up more than, say $75 for a skating party when I was in the second grade, the thought of spending three figures on a party, never mind four, just blows the ol' noggin.

Of course, it doesn't help that I'm all hopped up on Diet -- excuse me, Sugarfree -- Red Bull and am procrastinating doing work.

Sigh ... it is times like this that imagining myself getting hitched by a greasy-haired, stubbly chested Elvis impersonator sounds not just tempting, but downright reasonable.

WHAAAAAT?????

Ooops, sorry, just working on my bridezilla yell.